seasonally hidden.

"Life does not sleep - though in winter she retracts all advertisement. And when she does so, she is conserving and preparing for the future.And so it is with us. Seasonally, we too are stripped of visible fruit. Our giftings are hidden; our abilities are underestimated. When previous successes fade and current efforts falter, we can easily mistake our fruitlessness for failure.But such is the rhythm of spiritual life: new growth, fruitfulness, transition, rest... new growth, fruitfulness, transition, rest. Abundance may make us feel more productive, but perhaps emptiness has greater power to strengthen our souls.In spiritual winters, our fullness is thinned so that, undistracted by our giftings, we can focus upon our character. In the absence of anything to measure, we are left with nothing to stare at except for our foundation."

quoted text from "Anonymous: Jesus' hidden years and yours" by Alicia Britt Chole

20120626-210016.jpg

20120626-210016.jpg

life update: full-time.

it's been a long time since i have actually written out the activities and changes that have occurred in my life. for that reason, sharing where i am at and what i am currently up to, is extremely intimidating.

many of you know that for me, finding a full-time job has been a long time coming.  and praise the Lord, after much waiting, searching, and wondering, i was offered a full-time position this past April.  i accepted an offer to work for a local bank in their internet banking department, which means i am now a mix of tech support and customer service.  slightly intimidating, but a unique and actually exciting challenge most days.

believe it or not, since i started in April, up until this point, i have been doing some pretty crazy training/job application day after day for this position.  goodness, there's so much learn. federal regulations, new programs, account information, phone systems. whew! but truth be told, i'm actually somewhat of a data-computer geek, so i took to the data-entry part of the job quite quickly, and the customer service part just required a bit of a confidence boost (once i felt like i knew what i was doing) and everything else is just constant problem-solving.i really like solving problems. it's like i'm working on unique puzzles every day.

full-time employment is such a huge blessing. and naturally, i feel much more grown up. life doesn't necessarily feel any more or less busy, though. it's just a different kind of busy. my days require earlier mornings, routine lifestyle, and fewer evening activities, ensuring that i spend lots of time with my dear sadie.

today i worked a late shift, and had the opportunity to walk through the back parking lots, to meet my father for dinner at a new restaurant/brewpub that just opened in downtown Lititz. a little on the expensive side, for "pub food" but so absolutely worth it. dad and i tried four different foods... campfire chili, chipotle beef quesadillas, tequila lime chicken wings, and the "hog wild" pulled pork w/ root beer bbq sauce sandwich including homemade potato chips and pickles on the side. oh my goodness, i'm still stuffed. late dinner with my dad after working late... was definitely the highlight of my week. not only am i blessed to have a full-time job, but to be able to be working and living near enough to my parents, to be able to meet up last minute to enjoy their company, catch up on life, and share good food. the Lord has blessed me with so many dear things and His Grace is overwhelming in my life.

how have you seen God's blessings in your life this year?

LIFE HACK: Freezing Bacon

I absolutely love bacon.

As a single girl, I don't fly through my food too quickly and often throw things in a freezer. Usually this works great - foods last longer, and I just pull things out as I need them. Life is all about convenience (and small portions) for this girl on the go!

But one thing that really gets me frustrated is the frozen bacon dilemma. When I buy bacon (on sale, of course!), I will throw the entire pack into the freezer. Which is fine... until I want to eat it. Then I have to spend several hours waiting for the entire thing to thaw! (slight exaggeration), or usually I find myself getting impatient and trying to pry each piece apart, using a butter knife as though it were an ice pick (a girl shouldn't have to work so hard for her bacon!).

So, tonight I decided to try something new. Rather than throwing the entire pack of bacon into a large ziploc bag and throwing it back into the freezer, I thought to myself, "self, why don't you pull each strip of bacon apart now, and then freeze it, so you can save yourself the trouble later." I don't know why I hadn't thought of this sooner! So, here is my attempt at saving the hassle of chiseling away at a frozen brick of bacon in the somewhat near future:
- bacon (key ingredient)
- gallon-sized ziploc bag
- wax paper

It's simple, really. I just pulled off a piece of wax paper, placed several strips of bacon across wax paper for the width of the ziploc bag (approx. five strips), then folded the wax paper on each side and the bottom. This created a bit of a "pocket" look with the paper. Then I repeated this step until each piece of bacon was on its own, and slid the small layered pile of wax paper + bacon into the ziploc bag, and... ta-da!

Have you ever tried to freeze bacon as individual strips? I would love to hear your thoughts... feel free to leave your own tips 'n tricks in the comments!

unexpected & overwhelmed.

The other day was a very precious day...

I had the opportunity to watch the baby girl of two of my dearest friends as they were at work the other day... a blessing of having one part time job at the moment. What a special day, but I have a new respect for moms. It's not that I even had a difficult day or anything... I just realized how much more "busy" a day can seem! The breaks in my own familiar routine throughout the day... the bottle feeding, interacting, the napping... and doing it all over again several times a day! ... I loved it.

There was one moment late in the day that had me slightly worn down and yet managed to bring tears to my eyes... This beautiful girl was a breeze through the entire day, but naturally became fussy in the late afternoon when she decided she was hungry... I was trying to hold her off from having a bottle so that her mom could feed her once she got home, and I didn't want her to fall asleep again before eating... but nothing was satisfying this sweet bundle of joy...

So I did the only thing I could think of: I carried her around the house, cradled in my arms. And of course, this wasn't helping either, so I did the only other thing my tired and confused brain could think of... I started humming.

So here I am, pacing around the first floor of the house, rocking this beautiful baby in my arms, humming whatever made-up tune was in my head, and she silenced right up... and gazed up at me with those beautiful baby eyes... and somehow I had transitioned to "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" and before I knew it, there were tears streaming down my face. My heart was so full in that moment and I caught myself doing something I had always dreamed of doing someday... I realized that little "pang" of desire in that moment... desire to be a mom, and be able to soothe my own baby by humming a song...

It amazes me how my heart will so many times desire something that makes no sense to my mind. I see this so many times in my life... with so many situations... but this time, it was unmistakeable joy that I desired. I'm not necessarily itching to be married right this instant. I have many things to learn in life, and I am content in pursuing my independence and purpose and strengthening my character as I am... and I really am not itching to have children right this instant, knowing that it is not as "romantic" as that one little moment the other day... but knowing that those desires to someday be married... to someday have children of my own... knowing that those desires are not just a dream or an illusion, but that they are inherently a part of me, so much so that they bring me to tears...

Well, for that I am thankful. And encouraged. For that moment of unexpected and overwhelming joy in my heart will carry me a long way in being content today.

Narnia: Quotes

I have managed to tweet some of my favorite or the most outstanding quotes from throughout the Chronicles of Narnia series as I read each book... and I wanted to be sure to archive a compilation of each of those quotes. Some stood out for their simplicity, some for their humor, and others for their spiritual parallel and revelation in my own life. Here are those quotes:

#Narnia1:

"And he thought then, as he always thought afterward too, that he could not decently have done anything else."

"Nothing goes on in the in-between places..."

"Well, it's all over, anyway... and both thought it was; but they had never been more mistaken in their lives."

"I have stood here when the whole air was full of the noises of Charn... all in one moment one woman blotted it out forever."

"... the secret of the Deplorable Word... that was the secret of secrets."

"And the very first thing he did... he poured himself out a glassful of some nasty, grown-up drink and drank it off at one gulp."

"We are awake... We love. We think. We speak. We know."

"For what you see and hear depends a good deal on where you are standing: it also depends on what sort of person you are."

"But she was a dem fine woman, sir, a dem fine woman."

#Narnia2:

"Once there were four children... this story is about something that happened to them..."

"In the meantime we're pretty well off. There's a wireless and lots of books."

"She stayed behind because she thought it would be worth while trying the door of the wardrobe..."

"he remembered, as every sensible person does, that you should never shut yourself up in a wardrobe."

"There seemed, indeed, no more to say, and presently the four resumed their journey..."

"They all stared as hard as they could and no one felt very comfortable."

"the moment the Beaver had spoken these words everyone felt quite different."

"And Lucy felt running through her that deep shiver of gladness which you only get if you are being solemn and still."

"People who have not been in Narnia sometimes think that a thing cannot be good and terrible at the same time."

"His voice was deep and rich and somehow took the fidgets out of them."

"But just at this point Edmund went off in a dead faint."

"He knows the Deep Magic better than that... unless I have blood as the Law says all Narnia will be overturned and perish..."

"If she could have looked a little further back, into the stillness and the darkness before Time dawned..."

"I know not how it is, but this lamp on the post worketh upon me strangely."

"And that is the very end of the adventure of the wardrobe. But... it was only the beginning of the adventures of Narnia."

#Narnia3:

"This is the story of an adventure that happened in Narnia and Calormen and the lands between..."

"Oh the sweet air of Narnia! An hour's life there is better than a thousand years in Calormen."

"in spite of his rude words, Bree was a patient teacher."

"The difference is that people want to hear the stories, whereas I never heard of anyone who wanted to read the essays."

"See the bear in his own den before you judge of his conditions."

"the heat... struck up into his face as if from the opening of an oven door."

"I am telling you your story, not hers. I tell no one any story but his own."

"after one glance at the Lion's face he slipped out of the saddle and fell at its feet."

"That is why the Lion kept on my left. He was between me and the edge all the time."

"... Aslan (he seems to be at the back of all the stories)"

#Narnia4:

"Oh, don't you know? ... Aslan is the great Lion who comes from over the sea."

"Well, there's just this... it was Lucy who discovered it... she was right after all. Wouldn't it be fair to believe her this time?"

"To know what would have happened, child? ... No. Nobody is ever told that."

"It is hard for you... But things never happen the same way twice."

"But there must have been magic in his mane. She could feel lion-strength going into her."

"You are a lioness... And now all of Narnia will be renewed."

"You come of the Lord Adam and the Lady Eve, and that is both honor enough to erect the head of the poorest beggar, and shame enough to bow the shoulders of the greatest emperor on earth. Be content."

#Narnia5:

"Even looking is better than nothing."

"He began, almost for the first time in his life, to feel lonely."

"The twisted shape of the dead dragon lying in the moonlight would've been enough to frighten anyone but now he hardly noticed it."

"And there is nothing a dragon likes so well as fresh dragon."

"The invisible people agreed on everything."

"Speak on, dear heart."

"Sometimes, perhaps, I am a little impatient, waiting for the day when they can be governed by wisdom instead of this rough magic."

"I call all times soon."

"There are some things no man can face."

"Aslan, Aslan, if you ever loved us at all, send us help now."

"Courage, dear heart."

"His face was changed. Not only his eyes but everything about him seemed to be brighter."

"The light grew no less- if anything it increased- but they could bear it... They could see more light than they had ever seen before."

"Everyone on board was filled with joy and excitement, but not an excitement that made one talk."

"But there I have another name. You must learn to know me by that name."

"This was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there."

#Narnia6:

"Crying is all right in its way while it lasts."

"You would not have called to me unless I had been calling to you."

"But, first, remember, remember, remember the signs."

"It is a very funny thing that the sleepier you are, the longer you take about getting to bed..."

"deep down inside her, she was already annoyed with herself for not knowing the Lion's lesson quite so well..."

"Farther in, quick."

"Many come down, and few return to the sunlit lands."

"You see, Aslan didn't tell Pole what would happen. He only told her what to do."

"I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't an Aslan to lead it."

"Their quest had been worth all the pains it cost."

"I will not always be scolding. You have done the work for which I have sent you..."

"Even the Lion wept... each tear more precious..."

"You cannot want wrong things any more, now that you have died, my son."

"If ever you have the luck to go to Narnia yourself, do not forget to have a look at those caves."

#Narnia7:

"It is beyond all that I ever hoped for in all my life."

"Would it not be better to be dead than to have this horrible fear that Aslan... is not like we have believed in & longed for?"

"Everyone crowded round him and welcomed him and praised him and slapped him on the back."

"By mixing a little truth with it they had made their lie far stronger."

"You can't find out what it is like unless you can get to that country and taste it for yourself."

"Dearest... I will show you what I can, and what I cannot, do.""Further in and higher up!"

"Welcome in the Lion's name. Come further up and further in."

"The dream is ended: this is the morning."

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photo (32)

photo (32)

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narnia2

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narnia7

#NarniaFood:

"Wake up... it has turned into a toffee tree. And it's the loveliest morning." #Narnia1

"and that was where she learned to ride and swim and milk and bake and climb." #Narnia1

"It was a wonderful tea... brown egg, sardines on toast... buttered toast... toast with honey, and then a sugar-topped cake." #Narnia2

"lobsters, and salad, and snipe stuffed with almonds and truffles, and a complicated dish made of chicken livers and rice and raisins and nuts..." #Narnia3

"there were cool melons and gooseberry fools and mulberry fools and every kind of nice thing that can be made with ice." #Narnia3

"there was also a little flagon of the sort of wine that is called 'white' though it is really yellow." #Narnia3

"... a meal (it was chiefly of the whipped cream and jelly and fruit and ice sort)" #Narnia3

"It was, in fact, the smell of bacon and eggs and mushrooms all frying in a pan." #Narnia3

"roast apples are not much good without sugar, and they are too hot to eat with your fingers till they are too cold to be worth eating." #Narnia4

"sides of roasted meat that filled the grove with delicious smell..." #Narnia4

"wheaten cakes and oaten cakes, honey and many-colored sugars and cream as thick as porridge and as smooth as still water..." #Narnia4

"peaches, nectarines, pomegranates, pears, grapes, strawberries, raspberries - pyramids and cataracts of fruit." #Narnia4

"then... came the wines; dark, thick ones like syrups of mulberry juice, and clear red ones... and yellow wines and green wines..." #Narnia4

"with mushroom soup and boiled chickens and hot boiled ham and gooseberries, redcurrants, curds, cream, milk, and mead." #Narnia5

"an omelette... cold lamb & green peas, a strawberry ice, lemon-squash to drink... & a cup of chocolate to follow." #Narnia5

"But the magician himself drank only wine and ate only bread." #Narnia5

"There were turkeys and geese and peacocks... boars' heads & sides of venison... pies... ice puddings..." #Narnia5

"bright lobsters & gleaming salmon... nuts & grapes, pineapples & peaches, pomegranates & melons & tomatoes." #Narnia5

"There were soups that would make your mouth water to think of, and the lovely fishes called pavenders, and venison and peacock..." #Narnia6

"and pies, and ices and jellies and fruit and nuts, and all manner of wines and fruit drinks." #Narnia6

"cock-a-leekie soup, and hot roast turkey, and a steamed pudding, and roast chestnuts, and as much fruit as you could eat." #Narnia6

"delicious smell of sausages... mugs of frothy chocolate, & roast potatoes & roast chestnuts & baked apples w/ raisins..." #Narnia6

"breakfast: first... porridge & pavenders & kidneys & bacon & omelette & cold ham & toast & marmalade & coffee & beer." #Narnia6

doctor's orders.

doctor's orders.

Last week I made a last-minute quick trip to the eye doctor to update my prescription for contacts, while I am still under both of my parents' vision plans, and also since my contacts were almost gone, and I was on my last pair, which happened to be slightly irritating my eyes. Everything seemed to be going smoothly, although I could tell I had quite a headache and a harder time concentrating on anything on the screens that the "assistant" was showing me.

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There's No Great Loss Without Some Small Gain (via anne's blog)

My grandmother wrote this post recently and I thought it was so poignant that I just had to re-share it...

"...we absolutely must live in community with each other. Whether we admit it or not, what affects one of us affects all of us. God said it, and it is true."

I was embarrassed, even ashamed, when this thought came to me in the weeks after the Amish tragedy. I knew where the thought came from: years of reading and re-reading the Little House On The Prairie books, books I read on cold blustery days when the lane blew shut and the wind howled forlornly around our farmhouse. After lunch I would pull a blanket around me and read again how Caroline Ingalls dealt with the various disasters that came upon the … Read More

via anne's blog

book club: narnia

book club: narnia

I have always fancied being a part of a book club... not so much the Oprah style book club, but just the idea and availability of sitting around a table with snacks on a glorious summer evening with a few friends or acquaintances, re-living the tales or adventures from throughout a specific book, and the emotions or questions they would elicit. And that is, in fact, exactly what happened the other evening.

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The Amishman Comes Back (via anne's blog)

I helped to create a blog for my Grandmother to use to share her fabulous stories of her daily life... this was what she posted today. It made my heart smile. :]

I sat down for a while on an Adirondack chair under the century-old Norway spruce trees behind our house. I watched my husband come out the front door of the shop, apparently talking to someone who was standing just inside the door. Don's hand gestures were large and generous, sometimes waving my direction and sometimes swinging this way and that. I found it interesting, but not interesting enough to get up and see what the discussion was all abo … Read More

via anne's blog

enchantment of the heart

I saw the most enchanting sunset this evening...

It wasn't so much the beauty of it, but rather the way that every so often the setting sun would glimmer and captivate my entire view.  I feel like God was doing that same thing on my heart today. I realize He is always majestic, but every now and then I catch a new glimpse of Him that absolutely captivates me.

My heart was encouraged this morning by God's Word in James, as well as the message on this passage in church.  I am learning to be someone that is determined to persevere through life with joy, no matter the trials or the triumphs.  I want to be someone who is marked by compassion, with a slow tongue and a quick ear.  

My heart was also encouraged this afternoon with several conversations that I had throughout the day... conversations of adventure and life stories... conversations of heart issues... and conversations of spiritual brokenness, renewal, and longing.  It refreshes my soul to know that I have dear friends in this life that are concerned with matters of the heart. Friends who care less about my style of shoes and more about seeing Christ in me... for that is the cry of my heart.

Not every day. I have so many weaknesses and issues to work on, but I long for Him to shine through me, even on my worst days... to shine in such a way that one glimpse can take someone's breath away and captivate their view.

exciting things.

There are some things in life that just make my heart swell so big I want to shout things from rooftops and can't stop smiling and just want to share the news with the whole world... and sometimes it's not even my news to share!

Several nights ago I walked into my back door after spending the evening at my parents' house (and coincidentally was not feeling so well, ready to just crawl into bed)... and promptly received a text message from my dear roommate (who was staying at her parents' that night rather than our place, since her sister was in town)... and this is how the message read:

 

Now that was just a flurry of emotions right there! Of course, I was pretty sure what that meant, even without the image, but I am a visual learner, and I wanted more proof! I feel I must also explain that recently Kate's boyfriend Jonathan has been searching for houses, and I was waiting this weekend to hear whether an offer he made was accepted. So you can imagine that while I was excited, I also had no idea what to think... was it about a house?! Or was it ring?! Both are exciting things, but of course, for Kate's sake, I was hoping to hear that it was the ring!

Well, I can now, with full permission, "shout it from the rooftops" that my dear soul sister is engaged and has a ring on her finger! Exciting things! I also have permission to post these photos of her stunning ring! (good job, Jonathan!)

silly frustration.

I'm not typically a worrier. But there are a few things that can manage to get me all worked up... one of them being: my car.

I feel very silly when I get overly emotional, and especially when I am emotional over something like my car. But today was supposed to be a day filled with sunshine and coffee drinks and lots of productivity. Instead, I have a car that won't start, and when it does, it lurches forward like a horse trying to jump out of its gate. And for some reason, this has me curled up on my couch crying like a little girl.

It makes me wonder what it is I value so much about this large machine on four wheels. Is it the independence and freedom that it provides? The ability to be in control of something? Am I placing too much value on this inanimate object and allowing it to become an idol? Or am I merely crying out of frustration for not being able to adequately provide for myself? I don't have the money or the means to take my car to get it checked out professionally... let alone the money to actually get it fixed, whatever the issue may be.

Regardless of the actual reason, the result was the same: I felt like a silly emotional girl, crying over car problems.

:: Edit ::
As of now, my father has looked over my car and it appears as though it may be the fuel filter... a "simple fix." I am thankful to have a father who is able to help me work through these issues, but the frustration still remains and leaves me vulnerable to silly emotional states of being. I must learn to not get quite so worked up, though. My ultimate provider, my Father and Lord, has me in his hand.

layer by layer.

layer by layer.

Every now and then there are moments where I realize how truly blessed I am to know the people that I do... I recently had the opportunity to see gentleness, patience, and care in the quiet eyes and understanding tone of a dear friend. I'm not sure why this meant the world to me... to know that we have similar stories and outlooks on life; to be able to tell a small tidbit of my current life story and not be criticized or shrugged off nonchalantly; to know that someone was just simply listening.

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